And Thus He Was Caught with Guile

Faithful readers, who would you say is the most patriotic video game character?

If you answered Waluigi, Liu Kang or Tails, you're dead wrong. Try again.

If you then answered Mario, Scorpion or Sonic, you've got good taste in video games, but you really need to branch out and try new ones. And you're still wrong.


The answer is, of course, Guile from the Street Fighter series. Aside from being the best character in the game (my brothers could never defeat my Sonic Boom/Flash Kick combo), he also was specifically designed (by Japanese programmers) to be the most All-American video game character ever!

Don't believe me? Look at this picture and tell me it doesn't inspire you to break out in the Star-Spangled Banner.

America!

Sure, that image makes it look like Guile is going to punch our national bird in the face, but that man (created by Japanese programmers) is all-American, baby!

His theme song also inspires patriotic feelings -- so much, in fact, that the internet has decided that Guile's theme song is deserving of it's very own meme. Apparently the Guile theme goes well with any scene it's attached to, and makes that scene 48.15% more epic. So, without further ado here are some examples of the Guile Theme Goes with Everything meme:







And, of course:



Happy Birthday, America!

Run Loca Run

Top o' the mornin' to ya!

Even though St. Patty's be over, I'm still feeling a wee bit Irish and wanted to share this little ditty with all of you, my faithful readers, out there.

This video comes from a fine lass, and alert reader, named Crystal. And it tells the story of a little pug named Loca who, try as she might, can't run.



So there you go.

Now be off with ya before the banshee finds you wastin' time on the internet!

Once You K-Pop. . .

Ok, this one was my bad.

A couple months ago, alert reader, Mitch sent in a music video that struck me as quite unusual and very entertaining. So I put it in my file of potential posts.

I waited too long.

Since that time, this song and music video have exploded on the interwebs and has already spawned dozens of parodies, reaction videos and homages. When I saw it was going to be referenced on Saturday Night Live this weekend, I knew I had taken too long - and for this, I apologize.

HOWEVER, if you haven't seen it yet, here is Gangnam Style:



I know.

Honestly, I can't decide which part is my favorite. It could be that little kid busting a move. It might be the pelvic thrusting elevator guy. Or it may just be that horsey dance thing in general.

This song, created by a Korean pop star named Psy, is like a virus. It embeds itself in your brain and it won't go away until you start dancing (true story). The title of the song references living the high life in the Gangnam district of Seoul, Korea -- which would be like Beverly Hills here in America. For this music video, Psy made up some cheesy dance moves, threw in some Korean celebrity cameos and created something oddly magical, while introducing K-Pop to the majority of Americans.

So I apologize to you, faithful readers, and to you, Mitch, for sitting on this one too long.

And, to make it up to you, here is some extra stuff to help you appreciate Gangnam Style even more.

Here is the making of video:



Here are the lyrics, translated into English:

Oppa’s Gangnam style
Gangnam style

A girl who is warm and graceful during the day
A classy girl who knows how to enjoy a cup of coffee
A girl whose heart gets hotter when night comes
A girl with that kind of twist

I’m a guy
A guy who is as warm as you during the day
A guy who downs his coffee before it cools down
A guy whose heart bursts when night comes
That kind of guy

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let’s go until the end

Here's Psy on Ellen:



And here's the Saturday Night Live skit:




Anyone else think this is the beginning of a K-Pop invasion?

People Are (Still Disturbing) People

We live in a very inconsistent world. The economy is down. Gas prices are up. This year's NBA season didn't happen. The Breaking Dawn movie did happen. However, in a time of turmoil like we have today, it's comforting to know that some things never change. For example, you can always count on the fact that weird people hang out at Walmart. And, once again, this fact is being celebrated by Jessica Frech and her posse.

Remember the original People of Walmart music video? Well, here's round two, sent in by, alert reader, Kim. And, I need to warn you, faithful readers, it is just as horrific as ever.



*shudder*

And to the One Republic for Which It Stands. . .

During this season it's important that we remember what Independence Day is really all about. Sure, the 4th of July is a time for barbecuing, fireworks and cooking food with fireworks, but there is a deeper meaning to this holiday - a meaning that may have been forgotten.

So I'd like to take a more serious tone with this post, if I may. I'd like to present to you with a completely historically accurate depiction of what the founding fathers really did that special day over 235 years ago, sent in by, alert reader, Ryan.


There. Aren't you proud to be an American now?

I thought so.

People Are (Disturbing) People

If you haven't seen the website "People of WalMart" yet, you've been missing out. . .or maybe you haven't. Some of the images you're about to see may never leave your head. It's hard to believe that there are people dressed like this in our fashion-conscious world -- that is, until you actually go to your local WalMart and see it for yourself.

However, for those of us who are quite busy and don't have the time to go traipsing around a website for hours on end, there's a little number by Jessica Frech. This creative young lady took the images from People of WalMart and condensed them into one hilarious video -- sent to me by, alert reader, Bethany. Take a look, but, before you do, I feel like I should give the following disclaimer:

WARNING!! THIS VIDEO IS EXTREMELY CATCHY AND YOU WILL FIND THIS SONG STUCK IN YOUR HEAD FOR AT LEAST 72 HOURS AFTER VIEWING. ALSO, SINCE THE LYRICS ARE CLOSELY ASSOCIATED WITH THE IMAGES, THESE IMAGES WILL EMBED THEMSELVES INTO YOUR BRAIN AND YOU WILL BE FORCED TO LIVE WITH THEM FOR THE REST OF YOUR MORTAL LIVES!!

*clears throat* 

You have been warned. Proceed at your own risk.



I told you so.

So, which one disturbed you the most?

Was it big hair, dreadlocks, little skirt, red box, hot dog, puppeteer, smiley shorts, swipe right here, Tom Hanks, pet goat, belt buckle, Joseph's coat, jelly fish, call girl, prison mate, gonna hurl, skin cap, vanilla chip, pony tail, pirate ship, no shirt, no shoes, oops I took a poop, Spider-Man, back boobs, bumble bee, bad tubes, Metal creep, hipster creep, Little Bo Peep lost her sheep, Jamie Fox, Santa Claus, Woodstock, butt floss, man dress, Mother Goose, mullet time, car got loose, scary fruit, day care, Twilight, Kentucky hair, campout, fishing line, Golden Girls, too much wine, pedicure, race fan, horse mane, ladies' man, where's my shirt, where's my nurse, Masters of The Universe, Baywatch, rubber band, moonshine, wonderland, Bozo, hang low, Rocky Picture Horror Show, man purse, milk shake, skid row, beer break, uni tard, Lean Cuisine, fire sale, 80’s dream, Bieber's dad, camo crack, body flag, biscuit back, tramp stamp, checkout line, Civil War, danger sign, bathing suit, Grateful Dead, booty bomb, wide spread, long hair, health care, Victoria Secret's worst nightmare, Daniel Boone, pucker pup, Dr. Scholl's, grow up, half sale, rib sale, tailgater total fail, Mr. T, Flava Flav, not sure, white slave, workout, rump roast, Sailor Moon, hairy ghost, cupcake, caveman, beer run, soda fan, ripped pants, onesie, lion boy, Snuggie, meat isle, Huck Finn, beauty-fail, too much skin, gonna cry, gonna die, gonna jungle bunny ride, moth attack, board game, hangin’ out, no shame’ squeeze play, NRA or the I have no more to say one?

Vote now!


Author's note: I need to go wash my eyes out with bleach now. I had to study that blasted video for this post.

Get a Grip, Parry!

During these many years of Slice of Fried Gold I've introduced you to a number of musical numbers. Some of which were catchy and fun, and others that make you want to claw your eyes out. Although, for the record, if you're listening to an annoying song, it may be more effective to just plug your ears - now you know.

Anyway, I would like to add another song to the official Slice of Fried Gold playlist today. This one was brought to my attention by, alert reader, Simon. And, as a disclaimer, I have to let you know that it is both catchy and adorable. You have been warned!



Told you so.

For me, this song is going to go right up there with Hamster on a Piano or John Cage's 4'33" - you know, songs you can't help but sing along with. Parry Gripp, the songwriter of "Baby Monkey (Going Backwards On A Pig)," actually does a new song every week on his site, and his YouTube channel is full of awesome little ditties. Plus, he's the lead singer of the band Nerf Herder, who did the theme song for Buffy the Vampire Slayer so he's already a winner in my book.

So there you go. What did you think of "Baby Monkey (Going Backwards On A Pig)?" Is this going to make it to your iPod? Or will you do your best to scrub this song out of your head after reading this post?

Or are you unable to read this part of the post because you clawed your eyes out during the song? I told you it wasn't very effective.

Which One Sticks Worse?

It's time to vote.

Listen to each one of these songs and then let me know which one is the catchiest. And by "catchiest," I mean "the one that gets stuck in your head for the next few days."

The first one is an internet sensation, getting over 23 million hits in a little over a week. That's right, you know it, you have a love-hate relationship with it, it's so bad it's good, it's Friday, by Rebecca Black!



Chilling. For those of you who don't know the back story, this mind-numbing song and eye-gouging video were made by the Ark Music Factory. The Ark Music Factory is a company in California where parents can pay big bucks for the AMF to write an original song and create a music video for their child. This was the result. So, in short don't blame lil' Rebecca - it's not her fault.

Secondly, we have an interesting mix of fantasy and techno.  This one was originally shown to me by, alert reader, Mitch and it has a simple message to tell you: They're taking the hobbits to Isengard.



In case you missed it, they're taking the hobbits to Isengard. This clever song uses the Howard Shore score from Lord of the Rings and makes it sound like a dance club soccer album. And who knew that Will Turner had such a good sense of rhythm?

So now it is time to cast your vote. Which one of these is now stuck in your head, and will be until you listen to your scrubbing song? What's a scrubbing song, you ask? It's a song that will help clean any song out of your head without getting stuck itself. Something like "Now We Are Free" by Lisa Gerrard or "Car Wash" by Rose Royce.

I'm now going to listen to both of those songs on an endless loop for a few hours. Planning and writing this post almost destroyed my sanity.

And the Oscar Goes To. . .

Most people have already given their opinion on the Oscars (it was over a week ago, for crying out loud!!!), but I thought I'd throw in my six cents (because it's worth TRIPLE what two cents is -- and six times what a penny is!).

However, I'm not going to talk about the typical Best Actor/Actress/Picture stuff. Basically because I feel that Johnny Depp has been ripped off the three times he's been nominated because he didn't cry or scream/yell really intensely during his films -- I'm of the mind that you can't win an Academy Award for Best Actor or Actress unless you cry or scream/yell really intensely at some point during the movie. And I challenge any one out there to prove me wrong!

But I digress. I wanted to talk about the music. I was actually surprised that Enchanted (a lovely film that. . .uh. . .my wife made me go to. . .yeah. . .that's the ticket) was up for THREE nominations for best song and then lost to that homeless couple. Yes, I know the homeless couple can sing and I do like that song, but it was still interesting to me that a movie can be acknowledged as having, not one, but THREE Oscar-worthy songs and still not win. Odd.

But that's still a digression. The other day at work we found this list of all of the Academy Award nominated songs since the dawn of Oscar and started to listen to all the ones we could find. I was shocked with how many of them I actually knew and, in relation to that, how many I had no idea were nominated for Academy Awards. Songs like "Eye of the Tiger" and "Ghostbusters" were fun to work out to and sing-along to, but did you know they were Academy Award contenders (neither won, but. . .)? And songs like "I Just Called to Say I Love You" (or "I just called to say Ha Lobos!" as my Portuguese buddy used to sing) by Stevie Wonder never had any relation to a movie in my mind and so I was surprised to see them on that list as well.

So, in conclusion, I encourage all of you to look at this list and remember the good ones and laugh at the bad ones. . .and give Johnny Depp an Oscar, for crying out loud!