Screams from Room #209

Ok, faithful readers, I will admit that I've had some difficulty getting into the Halloween spirit this year. But this video, sent in by, alert reader, Dena, definitely gave me the creeps.

Quick Note: This is not one of those sudden jump-out videos. I wouldn't do that to you. . .in this post.



Now, there are a few of reasons why I think this video is fake. First of all, if it was recorded on September 4, 2003, why did it take so long for them to upload it? I mean, people have been uploading videos to YouTube since April 23, 2005 and people have been interested in the paranormal since at least September 10, 1993, so why would they wait until September 4, 2012 to upload it, never mind the fact that it's just getting popular just now in October of 2013. Wow. I think I put too many dates in that paragraph.

Also, why is it that we can hear Amy at the beginning of the audio, but not later on? And why can you hear John's muffled drive-thru speaker speech when he's outside of the room, but not when he's giving the description of what was in the room? Plus, the screams from room #209 come in a bit too clear, if we can't even hear John most of the time.

Furthermore, two seconds pass between the time the unnamed security manager says "John, are you there?" to when John walks back out of the room and is clearly not using his radio. And somehow, in those two seconds he manages to tell the security manager (and us, the audience) that he wants Amy to call the police, that there's no one in the room and that the furniture was all turned over. Then John puts the radio to his lips for one second, and manages to tell the security manager that the carpet was ripped up and the shower was on and, once again, there's nobody in there.

Finally, why didn't John turn on the light when he walked in the room? If I were John, turning on the lights would be the first thing I would do if I were to hear screams in a dark room -- call me crazy. A flashlight is a dark room is just asking for the spooky.

However, even if this video isn't real (which I doubt it is, because Jimmynut22, who uploaded it is also a filmmaker, apparently) (and he uploaded the exact same video with the title "Alien caught on camera" a day later on September 5, 2012), I still think it's effective as a creepy video and a fun way to kick off this Halloween season.

Waffles: A Challenge for the Internet

Oh Internet, you think you're so smart - so witty. You think you can take anything that's seemingly mundane and turn it into something cool that will endlessly entertain people like me and the faithful readers of Slice of Fried Gold.

Well I have a challenge for you, Internet.

Popularize this!



Yup. It's a waffle falling over. That's it. Thanks, Schnooleheletteletto! Not since Man Eats Hamburger has someone uploaded something so unremarkable to YouTube. And you, Internet, now have to find a way to make it into something people will want to share. You must create it into a meme that will be copied and repeated dozens of hundreds of time!

Are you up for it?




Oh. Ok. I guess you are. That was mildly entertaining, I guess. But I'm not that big of a SpongeBob fan, so...





Fine, Internet, you can try and appeal to me with my enjoyment of dubstep music, but I still don't think these waffles are a meme yet. For that you need many, many more-








Ok, those last three are just playing off past Slice of Fried Gold posts! You can't just-








And those are some my favorite TV shows, but still...








How is this possible?? It's just a video of a waffle falling over!





You win, Internet.

Beard Science

I'm normally a clean-shaven fellow. I also don't really like to wear hats,or sunglasses, but that's beside the point. This post is about facial hair. As I previously stated, most days out of the year I don't have any facial hair, but whenever I go up to our family cabin (which is usually once a year), I grow out my beard.

Not shaving while in the woods for about a week allows me to get past the awkward, drunk hobo look and return to the public with decent growth. I usually keep the beard until it gets annoyingly itchy, or until I have to start to trim and maintain it, which is also annoying. Having a beard gives me a chance to try a different look and hide my double chin. Plus, my wife likes me with facial hair, so that's a bonus. Although she called this last beard "distinguished," which means there's gray in it and I'm getting old.

However, every beard's life must come to an end in my house. And when that time comes, I don't quite know how to deal with it. Just shaving it off seems so unceremonious and anti-climatic. In the past I've shaved it off in parts and sported a goatee, an extended mustache and mutton chops for an evening. I should have been thinking bigger. I should have been thinking more grandiose. I should have been more creative, like Ben Garvin and his beard:



Now THAT'S how you shave a beard off! Well done, Mr. Garvin.

One of Those Weeks

Faithful readers, it's been one of those weeks. You know what I'm talking about? The kind of week when your head feels like it's going to do this:



Maybe that example was a bit graphic. Here's one for the kids:



And here's one more (by the same guy -- Simone Rovellini), just because it made me laugh:



Here's to hoping next week is a bit less stressful.

We All Scream for Goat Screams!

Last week's post was pretty lengthy, so I'm going to keep this one short and sweet. Are you faithful readers okay with that?



Good.

This probably doesn't shock you, but talking animals make me laugh. So when I found out that goats sometimes make noises similar to humans, it tickled my funny bone and I immediately sought out as many talking goat videos as I could find -- laughing all the way.

Then, alert reader, Mitch sent me this super cut compilation, which I would like to share with you now, so you don't have to go searching the interwebs for these clips. They're right here in one easy-to-digest video!



Not bad, eh? By the way, if you didn't laugh at that goat spitting and yelling at that man, you obviously have no sense of humor.

And just when I thought I couldn't enjoy screaming goats more, this video came along and made my week:


Unusual animal noises + pop culture =  hilarious!

So the moral of the post this week is. . .uh. . .goats are funny. . .

Don't you agree?



I thought so.

CAN YOU SAY "WELL DONE"?

I don't like being yelled at, so it's probably obvious that I don't like Dora the Explorer. I don't know why, exactly, Dora thinks all of the children who watch her show are hard of hearing, but she is actually one of the only people on earth that you can hear from space.

So while my disdain for Dora the Explorer ranks up there with the likes of taxes, Tyler Perry and Twilight (man, I guess I don't like things that start with the letter T), I do enjoy a good parody. Alert reader, Ryan, knows that I like parodies, so he sent in this video from CollegeHumor, which imagines what a live-action Dora the Explorer movie would be like.

Let's take a look, shall we?

Good stuff. I have to admit, I'd probably go see this movie.

HASTA LUEGO!

BUSTED!

Have you ever been caught doing something embarrassing? You know, like cheating on your diet, picking your nose or watching Twilight? And then you tried to cover it up or explain it away? If so, then you'll know exactly how this cat feels:



This video, sent in by, alert reader, Mitch, perfectly encapsulates a guilty conscience and an attempted cover up ("BARK! BARK! Bark. . .bark. . . . . .meow?").

I've always thought that cats were much smarter than they let on. This cat obviously learned Canineish just to mess with Fido next door, but only took the online course while his owner was away, so as not to raise suspicions. This way the human race would not learn of the extreme intelligence of their feline "friends" and therefore never expect the impending invasion/overthrow. But then he got cocky and careless and slipped up. . .big time!

We're on to you, cats. . .we're on to you.

Kitty Needs a Boost

Cats make me laugh more than dogs do.

Don't get me wrong, I love dogs, I just find cats to be more humorous. I think the reason behind this is that dogs are hyper and clumsy already, so when they bump into something or knock someone over, it's expected. On the other paw (ZING!), cats are usually prim and proper and so it's funny to see them do something silly or embarrassing. It's the same with reporters and newscasters - I get a big kick out of seeing them goof up.

However, I've also noticed that cats are even funnier with some additional help. On the internet, people have used things such as music, sound effects, captions and voice-overs to help boost the funny level of kitty cats.

I was originally going to show you a picture of a normal cat and then show you how funny it was with a caption, but it literally impossible to find a picture of a cat on the internet without a caption these days. Instead, here's this video of two regular cats interacting with each other:

Click here to watch the video because they disabled embedding, which is really annoying.

See? It was cute, yeah, but not laugh out loud funny.

Now, let's add the human element, as portrayed in this video sent to me by, alert reader, Jen. Witness the difference:



See? Much better.

So, to all you cats out there who think you may rule the world, just remember, in addition to feeding you and giving you shelter, we also make you funnier. So don't look at me with that high-and-mighty smug look on your face the next time I walk by, okay?. . . .You're not even listening, are you?

I MADE THIS FOR YOU!

I feel behind the times. Julian Smith has been around for a while now and has a HUGE online fan base, yet I just heard about him from, alert reader, Jeff C. a couple weeks ago. I am ashamed.

However, to make it up you, my faithful readers, I'd like to present to you a small sampling of the plethora of videos this guy has made. He's very talented. Since I was first introduced to him I have watched numerous videos of his and I've found something entertaining about each one. Plus he's a clean comic, which I really appreciate.

Here's to you, Julian (if that is your real name):

Hot Kool Aid - This is the first Julian Smith video I ever saw, and I think it's the one that helped him make his mark.



Note: I don't know why they're British in that clip. 

Malk - This was the second one that I watched, also recommended by Jeff C. It's bizarre, but that seems to be Julian's style.



Techno Jeep - Proving that he is as innovative as he is humorous, this video shows Julian's creativity/boredom.


 
Waffles - This final video in this sampler platter showcases one of Julian's regular characters, Jeffery.



There are many, many other humorous Julian Smith videos on his site and on YouTube, but I figured I had to stop at four, because anything more would be overkill.

However, even though his videos average over a million views each, now that he's made Slice of Fried Gold, his life is truly going to change - much like many other people I've featured on this site.

You're welcome, Julian.

I'll See That Video, and I'll Raise You a Kitty

Remember a while back when we were discussing that Pure Russian Joy video? Well, it still brings a smile to my face each time I see it, but I will admit I don't laugh as hard at it anymore. So imagine my utter elation when, alert reader, Derek showed me the following video (sorry, Skyloo, you're not gonna be able to see this one at work - here's something to keep you entertained in the mean time):



I told you this Trolololol thing was spreading.

Now, while most of you will find the humor in that video immediately, some of you will be asking "What is it with you and cats, The Former 786? Why do you find them so funny?" Here's my theory on that: Cats are supposed to be these elegant, graceful and intelligent creatures, so when they do something stupid, it's comedy gold. Kind of like when newspeople make mistakes - hilarious!

So this video takes something that I already liked, dipped it in chocolate, filled it with cheese and then covered it with frosting.

Dang. I just made myself hungry - gotta go! Keep trololoing!

Wink, Wink

You know, I can't tell which is worse on this ad for Winkers: the actual product, or the video itself. So I'm going to let you decide.

Yes, this video is over 3 minutes long. No, you don't have to watch the whole thing. But I do recommend at least jumping around a bit so you can see the wide (HA!) range of styles that Winkers offers you, the customer. Plus, the music sounds like a movie soundtrack from the 80s!

Enjoy!



Want more information? They have a website (click here) that's just as professional as this video.

Turn Around Bright Eyes. . .Literally

This was first introduced to me by Lobbie, and then my supervisor at work sent it to me a few minutes later - so it's spreading quickly and you've probably already seen it, but I decided to put it on here anyway 1. Because I think it's funny and wanted to "catalog" it and 2. Just in case you haven't seen it.

Here's the "literal video version" of Bonnie Tyler's classic, Total Eclipse of the Heart. Yes, this is the actual video. Yes, it's bizarre. Sure, the new literal lyrics are juvenile at times - so am I.

Enjoy!

Coolest Find of the Year (So Far)!

A Choose Your Own Adventure You Tube video!



Sure, it's cheesy, but it was fun to do and I think it's the start of a trend of these kind of videos.

(NOTE: If you're having issues with your pop-up blocker not letting you choose your course of action, hold down Ctrl when you click on the choice. If that doesn't work, then tell your browser to allow pop-ups from blogger.com. If you don't want to do that, just go to the direct link for this video on You Tube. And if you don't want to do that. . .why are you trying out this post in the first place? :) )

Pork, Beans, and 15 Minutes of Fame

Recently Weezer released the video for their new song, "Pork and Beans."

I like it. I like it a lot.

I enjoy it because 1. It's a catchy and fun song and 2. It showcases numerous references to internet videos that have been popular for the past couple of years.

Here it is, in it's entirety:



So, here's my point (aside from showing off a great song with a really cool music video), I enjoy funny/entertaining internet videos and always try to keep up with the latest and most popular ones. However, there are some in this music video that I don't know. I was hoping that you out there in Internetland could help me get some of the other inside jokes. These are the ones that I recognize in the order they first appear:

1. The Numa Numa kid

2. Drama Prairie Dog

3. Diet Coke + Mentos

4. G.I. Joe PSAs

5. Guiness World Record for most T-Shirts worn at one time

6. Chris Crocker (LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!)

7. All Your Base are Belong to Us

8. Miss South Carolina

9. Chocolate Rain

10. Shoes (WARNING: Contains strong language after 1:26)

11. Peanut Butter Jelly Time

12. Will it Blend? (one of MANY!)

13. Charlie the Unicorn

There are also various lightsaber moments that could refer to the various incarnations of the Star Wars Kid or other fan videos with lightsabers.

So, what did I miss? I know that I don't know who that karate guy is, or the rainbow socks girl, or the dancing guy. If you know who these people are, as well as any others I have missed, please let me know so that I can be better informed and up-to-date on the funny and entertaining You Tube videos out there.

In addition, you'll get to sound smart, which is always a plus.

Stupid Game Show Answers

Few things in this world can make me laugh as hard as people saying stupid things on accident (on purpose. . .still funny, but less so). Upon random searchings on YouTube yesterday I found a user who exclusively puts clips of Game Show bloopers on the site. I enjoyed them thoroughly and I wanted to share them with you AND ask for your vote as to which set of videos entertained you the most. So here are three of them (picked at random) presented for your vote:
(note: some of these clips contain "PG-13" material)

#1



#2




#3



To vote, just call 1-866-Idols-04. . .and if that line is busy then you can just vote in the comments section for this post.