Movie trailers are a bunch of teases and flirts.
They give you just enough information to peak your interest, but they don't tell you everything you need to know before you get into the relationship. Sometimes movie trailers even lie to the audience. For example, sometimes they'll use a song that isn't to be found anywhere on the actual movie soundtrack. Or, in some cases, editors will put a line or scene next to another, when, in the actual film, those lines/moments are nowhere near each other. This is all to get an emotional response from the audience and hopefully draw them to the theaters, but it is still a form of deception.
When making a movie trailer you can make it look pretty much how you want, so it's no surprise that, five years ago or so, a bunch of re-cut movie trailers flooded the internet. People would take movie trailers we know and love, and edit them with different lines, music, and even scenes to make them look like a different genre of movie. Some say that this is because of the availability of consumer-level digital video editing suites, but I think it's because people were tired of being lied to and they wanted to show movie trailers for the deceptive teases that they are!
And as I was discussing mashup trailers with a friend recently, I realized that, while I have seen many of these re-cut trailers and have enjoyed 16.8% of them, I didn't have any here on Slice of Fried Gold. There are a TON of these trailers out there, but I wanted to make sure that I showed you, my faithful readers, the best ones that are out there.
So without further ado, I present to you the top five re-cut/mashup trailers on the internet:
#5 - West Side Story
Why it's on the list: I love zombie movies and zombie-related things. Plus, with only the addition of some title cards and a few simple special effects, the creators of this mashup made this cheesy musical adaptation of Romeo and Juliet look like 28 Days Later. Also, this re-cut trailer proves that creepy sound effects and quick cuts (even of people dancing) makes people feel uneasy. However, I think the actual West Side Story movie makes people uneasy anyway, so. . .
#4 - Toy Story/The Dark Knight
Why it's on the list: This trailer reminds me of when, as a kid, I used to mute Sesame Street and turn on the radio to see if I could make the lips on the TV match up to the music. It didn't always work, but one time I did successfully "make" a Muppet sing the lyrics to "Unskinny Bop" by Poison. The creators of this mashup did a spectacular job of making Buzz Lightyear and Woody look like they were reciting lines from The Dark Knight. And the music and sound effects match up quite well, as well. A lot of work went into this mashup, and it shows.
#3 - Sleepless in Seattle
Why it's on the list: When you ask someone to think of a romantic comedy, Sleepless in Seattle is one of the first ones they're going to name. It's everything a romantic comedy should be, so it's fun to see it played up as a thriller. Watching Meg Ryan creepily lurk and stalk Tom Hanks and his son is particularly enjoyable. If this was the actual trailer, I probably would have seen this film in theaters. And I must say that the clips of the blue-filtered fire crawling across the ceiling is a touch of genius.
#2 - Mary Poppins (Scary Mary)
Why it's on the list: I always thought that the creepiest part of Mary Poppins is when that old man tries to steal Michael Banks' money and they run away and end up in that back alley, but this trailer proves otherwise. I never realized how supernatural this movie was until I saw this re-cut trailer. Now I realize that Mary Poppins is just as creepy as Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.This one comes in ahead of the others because it manages to make the original movie look scary while only using clips from the original movie - only some music, color changes and title cards are added. This one is genuinely creepy.
#1 - The Shining
Why it's on the list: While this wasn't the first re-cut trailer, this was the one that opened the floodgates. In October 2005 a contest was held by the Association of Independent Creative Editors to see who could come up with the best genre-bending trailer and this one won - and I agree with that decision. I applaud Robert Ryang for making this trailer that is completely different from the movie. And while this trailer suffers from sub-par voiceover work (it doesn't sound authentic), the use of Peter Gabriel's "Solsbury Hill" would cover a multitude of sins.
So there you go. I know there is a slew of other mashups and re-cut trailers out there, but these are the ones that I feel were worth your time. And I'm all about not wasting your time.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
Fill My Eyes with that Double Vision
While this may not seem like much of an accomplishment to you, I, personally, am quite surprised at this. Since the last time we talked, I have stared death in the face and threw caution to the wind. Yes. . .I ate the new KFC Double Down sandwich.
For those of you not "in the know" the Double Down is, essentially a sandwich without bread. They've taken bacon, cheese and a special sauce and slapped it between two pieces of fried (or grilled) chicken.
This is what it looks like in the ads:
And this is what it looks like in reality:
Amazing what a little makeup will do, eh?
So, just to give you the facts, this "sandwich" costs $4.99, plus tax. They don't serve it in the UK. The original recipe (fried) version offers 540 calories and has 32 grams of fat and 1380 milligrams of sodium. The grilled version is only 460 calories with 23 grams of fat, but it packs 1430 milligrams of sodium into this little package. What does this all mean? I don't know. I've never really been a calorie counter. But I did figure out during my research that eating burns 85 calories per hour, so if you slow down and take six hours to eat your Double Down, you actually have worked off the calories you took in - right?
Now, I was fortunate enough to have a wonderful, lovely, intelligent, generous, hard-working and awesome coworker buy one for me to try, so I got to test it out for free. Since free food normally tastes better than regular food, my opinion may be a little biased, but I'll attempt to be subjective in my review. And here it is:
Imagine you're in a restaurant and you order the chicken cordon bleu. Your order comes out beautifully arranged on a plate with side dishes and garnishes. Then you toss your knife and fork aside and proceed to pick up the chicken with your bare hands and eat it. That's what the Double Down is like. It just tastes like you're eating a main dish with your hands. It tastes fine. It tastes good, in fact, but it doesn't really taste as special as I had hoped. Also, as expected, it was a little smaller than it looked on TV. Plus, I did feel a little iffy afterward - I think all the sodium got to me.
So should you, my faithful readers, try it? Well, that's up to you. I thought it tasted good, and it was definitely fun to try, but I don't know if I would pay money to buy another one. I'd rather spend my chicken budget on Alice Springs Chicken from Outback Steakhouse. But, if my wonderful, lovely, intelligent, generous, hard-working and awesome coworker wanted to buy another one for me, I wouldn't turn my nose up at it (Hint! Hint!).
Now, since this entry is all about doubles, let's move on to the next topic - sleeping. After eating a sandwich like that, I wanted to take a nap. And what better place to take a nap than this beautiful, bright orange sofa!
"But, The Former 786," you say, "I also would like to take a nap and there isn't enough space for two on that beautiful, bright orange couch!" Not a problem, faithful reader!
*cue Transformer sound effect*
That's right, this sofa TRANSFORMS INTO A BUNK BED!
The Doc Sofa/Bed was brought to my attention by, alert reader, Zufelt. I did some quick research online and found out that it is sold by a company called Bonbon Trading. Now, before you get too excited about this bed, know that 1. This furniture comes from England, and 2. This sofa/bunk bed costs $6800! That's more than I make in a week!
However, if you're still interested, I should inform you that the Doc sofa/bed does come in other colors and there is an "extra large" version that costs closer to $9000.
If you're STILL willing to buy one. . .well, then you have too much money and should think of donating that money to your favorite blog about random stories/videos/products. . . that has the word "Slice" in the title. . . and is authored by someone with a number in their name. . .
I accept cash and two-party checks - or you can just pay me off in Double Downs. Although, at five bucks and 540 calories a pop, I probably wouldn't live past 1/3 of the full payment.
Oh well, what a way to go!
Monday, April 12, 2010
I'll See That Video, and I'll Raise You a Kitty
Remember a while back when we were discussing that Pure Russian Joy video? Well, it still brings a smile to my face each time I see it, but I will admit I don't laugh as hard at it anymore. So imagine my utter elation when, alert reader, Derek showed me the following video (sorry, Skyloo, you're not gonna be able to see this one at work - here's something to keep you entertained in the mean time):
I told you this Trolololol thing was spreading.
Now, while most of you will find the humor in that video immediately, some of you will be asking "What is it with you and cats, The Former 786? Why do you find them so funny?" Here's my theory on that: Cats are supposed to be these elegant, graceful and intelligent creatures, so when they do something stupid, it's comedy gold. Kind of like when newspeople make mistakes - hilarious!
So this video takes something that I already liked, dipped it in chocolate, filled it with cheese and then covered it with frosting.
Dang. I just made myself hungry - gotta go! Keep trololoing!
I told you this Trolololol thing was spreading.
Now, while most of you will find the humor in that video immediately, some of you will be asking "What is it with you and cats, The Former 786? Why do you find them so funny?" Here's my theory on that: Cats are supposed to be these elegant, graceful and intelligent creatures, so when they do something stupid, it's comedy gold. Kind of like when newspeople make mistakes - hilarious!
So this video takes something that I already liked, dipped it in chocolate, filled it with cheese and then covered it with frosting.
Dang. I just made myself hungry - gotta go! Keep trololoing!
Monday, April 5, 2010
Hop-Hop-HoAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Due to the enormous success of the creepy Santa posts, I thought I'd do something along those lines for the season.
So, without further ado, here are some creepy Easter Bunnies:
So, without further ado, here are some creepy Easter Bunnies:
"You can run, Emily, but you can't hide!"
They're playing a game - it's called "who can have the widest eyes?"
Easter Bunny photo bomber, sucka!
The deep, soulless eyes of the bunny pierced Billy's soul.
If the devil was a rabbit, this is what he would look like.
"I friggin' HATE dis time of year!"
"Bwahahahahahahaha! Seriously?" Andrea laughed, "You think THIS is what a bunny looks like?"
"We come in peace, little one. Is this your leader?"
This is what happens when you try and make the eye holes bigger. . . by yourself. . . without a mirror.
"Back off, Lady!This kid is one of us now."
"Mom, I don't think it's supposed to be an Easter White Chipmunk-Bear Hybrid."
Floppy was a very stealthy Easter Bunny, even with his abnormally large elephantitis feet.
The skates are a good idea, Crystal. They'll help you outrun Roadkill Rabbit, if needed.
Peter Cottontail went a little too heavy on the mascara this year.
This is the reason why you shouldn't put your Easter Bunny mask in the microwave.
Half mask = Completely creepy!
Kenneth stared at the bunny, the bunny stared at him - daring each other to make the first move.
"HIS EYES ARE TOO REALISTIC! BUNNIES SHOULDN'T HAVE HUMAN EYES!"
"Ok, Andrew and Karly, say 'METALLICA FOREVER! ROCK ON! WOOOOOOOOO!' "
"Kill your family, Lee. Kill them all. You know you want to."
Fuzzy wasn't like the other animals, his abnormally placed eyes put him outside the pet store with the rest of the outcasts.
Hobart: A special bunny, for special children.
"RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWRRRRRR!"
There's something wrong about actually being able to see the dude's eyes IN the costume.
The white make-up doesn't help this costume look any better.
I smell a lawsuit coming on!
"No, Mom. I've seen a bunny before and THIS is NOT a bunny!"
If Chewbacca married a rabbit and had children, and then the children were exposed to nuclear waste.
Anyone else getting a Donnie Darko vibe from this photo?
"Yesssssssssss, Jessica. The candy is completely safe and not poisonous."
"HA! HA! HA! We made the little human female cry!!"
They're playing a game - it's called "who can have the widest eyes?"
Easter Bunny photo bomber, sucka!
The deep, soulless eyes of the bunny pierced Billy's soul.
If the devil was a rabbit, this is what he would look like.
"I friggin' HATE dis time of year!"
"Bwahahahahahahaha! Seriously?" Andrea laughed, "You think THIS is what a bunny looks like?"
"We come in peace, little one. Is this your leader?"
This is what happens when you try and make the eye holes bigger. . . by yourself. . . without a mirror.
"Back off, Lady!This kid is one of us now."
"Mom, I don't think it's supposed to be an Easter White Chipmunk-Bear Hybrid."
Floppy was a very stealthy Easter Bunny, even with his abnormally large elephantitis feet.
The skates are a good idea, Crystal. They'll help you outrun Roadkill Rabbit, if needed.
Peter Cottontail went a little too heavy on the mascara this year.
This is the reason why you shouldn't put your Easter Bunny mask in the microwave.
Half mask = Completely creepy!
Kenneth stared at the bunny, the bunny stared at him - daring each other to make the first move.
"HIS EYES ARE TOO REALISTIC! BUNNIES SHOULDN'T HAVE HUMAN EYES!"
"Ok, Andrew and Karly, say 'METALLICA FOREVER! ROCK ON! WOOOOOOOOO!' "
"Kill your family, Lee. Kill them all. You know you want to."
Fuzzy wasn't like the other animals, his abnormally placed eyes put him outside the pet store with the rest of the outcasts.
Hobart: A special bunny, for special children.
"RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWRRRRRR!"
There's something wrong about actually being able to see the dude's eyes IN the costume.
The white make-up doesn't help this costume look any better.
I smell a lawsuit coming on!
"No, Mom. I've seen a bunny before and THIS is NOT a bunny!"
If Chewbacca married a rabbit and had children, and then the children were exposed to nuclear waste.
Anyone else getting a Donnie Darko vibe from this photo?
"Yesssssssssss, Jessica. The candy is completely safe and not poisonous."
"HA! HA! HA! We made the little human female cry!!"
Happy Easter, everybody!
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