Sunday, December 28, 2008

Announcement Time

I thought that I should let my faithful readers out there know something I've kept hidden for a while. . . .This is my baby boy, Riley.

Riley was from my first marriage. He's a very active two-year-old. He enjoys making birdhouses, running marathons and he's just finished his first book about a young wizard who finds out that he's actually a sparkly vampire and so he goes on a quest to find a ring that will save the mythical creature preserves! He's a bright young boy and I'm so proud he's my son.

I'm just kidding.

Riley actually is the child of this woman, Megan McCormic:

Wait. . .maybe not. . .

It looks like Megan was making up some stories of her own!

Megan, if you're going to lie to your ex-boyfriend, don't involve the press!

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Mein Fuhr-osting!

I like justice. I oppose injustice.

So imagine my fury when I found out that a ShopRite supermarket in Easton, Pennsylvania ruined a 3-year-old child's birthday by refusing to make his cake the way his mother requested it. All Deborah Campbell wanted was for them to write out her son's name in the frosting - they denied her.


What horrible people would do such a thing? Why would anyone want to disappoint a little child like this? Why would they want to ruin the birthday of poor little. . . wait. . .WHAT'S his name??

Adolf. . .Hitler. . .Campbell??

Well then. . .that changes everything.

What horrible parents would do such a thing? Why would anyone want to name a little child that? Why would they want to ruin the life of a poor little kid?

Now, I'm not going to judge them too harshly- after all, it's not as completely ridiculous as some of the names picked by celebrities for their children - but why name your child after a name associated with hatred, bigotry and bad facial hair?

Well, Heath Campbell said he named his son after Adolf Hitler because he liked the name and because "no one else in the world would have that name." Right. And there's a REASON for that!

Apparently this isn't the first time the ShopRite store has had to deal with the Campbell family and this issue. Karen Meleta, a spokeswoman for the supermarket, said that ShopRite has denied similar requests from the Campbells for the last two years - including a request for a swastika!

I guess the Campbells aren't exactly trying to change the connotation of little Adolf Hitler's name.

The Campbells have two other young children. Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell will be one in April and their two-year-old is named JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell. . .

These people should have their child-naming license revoked.

In fact, they probably shouldn't be having kids at all. Heath Campbell says that he was raised "not to avoid people of other races but not to mix with them socially or romantically." But, he then assures us all by saying he "would try to raise his children differently." At least he's trying, right?

In the end, the Campbells went to Wal-Mart and they made the cake without any qualms or quarrels.

So this story has a semi-happy ending. . .about the cake. . . I guess. . .*Sigh*. . .

Saturday, December 13, 2008


Recently a friend showed me a site where people can submit pictures of children being frightened by Santa Claus. I found it to be hilarious and, therefore, chose to share it with you.

There are over 250 pictures on the site (and it's growing), but I thought I'd share with you just some of the ones that I found particularly funny.


Caleb doesn't seem too sure about all this. I mean, Santa looks shifty!

I don't know who's more miserable - the kid or his dad.

Twin terror!

At least they're keeping warm.

Tee-hee. It's a pun!

This is the face of sheer terror!

Not scared of Santa - just doesn't like being around her brothers.

This is why they don't do Mrs. Claus most of the time.

"What? Why is my sister scared? Who's holding me?"

I love that we get the play-by-play on this fright fest.

I call this one "Screaming in Three-part Harmony."

Leilani is terrified. . that her parents took her to a Wal-Mart Santa!

This Santa looks surprised at Antigone's and Cindy's reactions. He must be new.

"I'm reaching out to you! Why won't you hold me?? WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME??"

The picture really says it all.

"Almost free! Oh, sweet, sweet freedom!"

That kid looks like 1. He ate something really sour or 2. Santa smells really bad.

One brother freaks out while the other quietly plots his revenge.

"Abort! Abort! Get me out of here! Now!"


Santa has resorted to taking hostages now.

Not even Mommy could quell Sara's terror!

Ashley and Brandon try their karate moves against the jolly red fellow.


Like Mother - Like Daughter

Emily isn't scared. She's just sulking at the crappy Santa she got this year.

"Please stop touching me, Mr. Creepy Elf Man."

Nominee for creepiest Santa ever!

"Don't taze me, bro!!"

Uh-oh. The lip is out. We all know what's gonna happen next.

I don't think Katie is scared. I just think that she's overwhelmed by the emotional impact of that book.

I don't blame this kid. That Santa is TERRIFYING!

"What? Dominik is frightened? This looks like a job for. . .SUPER MOM!!"

This Santa looks like a fisherman on the high seas.

"There is something SERIOUSLY wrong with this dude's eyebrows!"

That kid's face is almost as red as his tie!


I'm sensing a pattern. . .

The youngest one distracts Santa by pulling his beard while the middle child makes his escape.

Obviously Photoshopped, but still scary.

Triangle Girl is NOT happy!

Why the long face, Coltrane?

"Help! He's trying to steal my candy. . .even though he just gave it to me!"

"GAH!! Where did THAT thing come from??"

I'm more scared for Santa in this picture. That kid looks EVIL!

"Ha ha! You are my prisoners! You children will never escape my clutches!"

So there you go. You can find all the rest of the pictures at this website.

Merry Christmas!